Sunday, May 16, 2004
150504 [College Day]
I'm
lost, yet again.
Among the bustle of the school.
With excitement and laughter of the people around me.
I feel so
small
Greeting all those i know
Looking at their happiness written all over their faces.
Sadly, my heart belongs to no where.
No where.
It's really bad to know too many people
Where none of them are really close to heart.
Understanding this the hard way is tough.
But i've never seemed to have learnt from my mistakes.
For me, escaping reality is bliss.
At least there is hope that i'll be happier.
I'm already very tired.
I broke down today.
Alone.
At the balcony behind co room.
Wrapping my hands around myself
In attempt to comfort myself.
With the cold wind blowing at my face,
Sending a shiver down my spine.
Shortly after, I went back to co room to play cards,
Acting as if nothing has happened.
This is so tough.
It's so tough being me.
Fat.
Ugly.
Idiotic.
Stupid.
I detest myself.
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